What is Femdom? The Beginners Guide to Femdom Bondage
What is Femdom?
Femdom is oftentimes associated with various aspects of BDSM and acronym for bondage and discipline, dominance and submission, sadism and masochism. This can include many different forms of bondage like pegging, humiliation, JOI, and many more kinks we have not mentioned. The core feature of Femdom is the female partner is in total control, Female Dominance, this can carry outside the bedroom into other interesting scenarios.
Some of these nonsexual scenarios can lead to intense bedroom experiences, some of these examples would be forcing the femdom partner to run errands, force cleaning, and only speaking when spoken to rules… just to name a few.
The look and feel of femdom is not what they portray in the movies, take the time to read here and see how you might define your female dominance. Empower yourself now.
How to Start Femdom
Often times when BDSM is mentioned, we think of the stereotypical dark and dank sex dungeon and that can be really intimidating. However, giving over sexual control to your female dominant partner can be exhilarating. Start with a simple conversation with your partner about wanting to explore this kink a bit more! Femdom is erotic for both partners, while the male might enjoy being dominated, and maybe even humiliated a bit, the female is sure to enjoy the control and power that comes from being dominant, role play can be a ton of fun for any gender!
After talking with your partner to ensure that this is something both of you are comfortable exploring, as the conversation surrounding your sexual desires is essential, you can then plan a few simple methods by which you will create a femdom environment during your sex.
Femdom Power Comes from Your Voice
Your voice is the best tool in your arsenal to exude control over your partner and dictate what happens during your sex fantasy. Femdom is all about being in charge, so having a confident tone and volume of your voice is essential to living the fantasy.
Begin with some lighthearted verbal commands as you gain comfortability and experience in this practice.
Tell your partner to take his clothing off in a specific manner, and have them do a nude spin to display themselves for you. Have them get on their knees and start kissing you starting with your feet, have them work their way up and you get to set the speed with your authoritative voice. Telling them that they’ve been extra naughty and that they are going to be punished. Your voice is the control center, and use it to create the directions that your submissive is absolutely forced to follow.
When it comes to voice commands, take your typical everyday niceties and toss them out the window. There are no more "can you" or "will you" phrasing and questions, instead use bold commands "do", "faster", and "now" and take control of the encounter.
Verbal Humiliation
Aside from using your voice to control your partner's actions during the experience, you can also complement this with another aspect of BDSM: verbal humiliation.
Humiliation and female dominance go hand in hand, so if you plan to be a femdom, then you just might want to get ready to make a little fun of your partner.
Just how far you wish to go with this depends on yourself and your relationship, but to begin mildly, you should start with simple phrases and quick, humiliating words.
Some examples include:
- “You’re not good enough to be in charge.”
- “You can fuck me better than that, can’t you?”
- “I don’t want to hear your sissy voice.”
- “You’re my little toy tonight.”
After you establish how you both feel, you can up the intensity by furthering the humiliation. Some enjoy establishing the roleplaying idea of telling their partner that they are not good enough in bed, wishing that there was another partner to do better, or making fun of the size of their cock.
No matter what you do, remember that you are a beginner, and you do not want to offend your partner to extremes until they fully establish that they enjoy the humiliation, so always start small and progress with time and experience.
Like Swinging with your partner, these are individual journeys you challenge yourself to navigate and you're doing it together. Like everything done well, it's an emotional experience for many people, joy, anger, and crying may likely be part of the work you put in. In the end, it can make for a much closer and connected partnership for an intimate couple(one thats plays sexually).
Physical Humiliation
In addition to degrading your partner with the power of your voice, you can also use physical humiliation as a tool in your BDSM toolkit. When first starting with physical humiliation go with something small and relatively private. Try one of the following for your submissive male to do...
- Wear lady's underwear on an outing
- Clean the House in a humiliating outfit
- Lick your shoes and feet.
Starting small is important to know what your boundaries might be, as things ramp up you can take it a step further and explore aspects like penetrative play, pegging, and even physical pain.
Femdom Pegging and Penetration
Now that you know a few tips, to get the wheels in motion to start your Femdom adventure, it's time that we discuss a few more advanced techniques and perhaps a great deal more satisfying play in motion. The act of penetration on your male partner can be immensely satisfying for both partners. Penetration can be done in a few different ways. As a precursor before going further, always be sure to use an ample amount of lubricant whenever considering penetration, as a series of injuries can occur beyond the pleasures of BDSM, always use a lubricant.
Introducing an anal plug, like our renowned Reverb product from Lacier can be inserted either by the dominant or the submissive. The great thing about using an anal plug like the reverb is this allows further control with vibration settings and the steel material ensures a sanitary experience.
All L’Acier products like the Reverb stainless steel anal plug has versatile handle that make for easy reach and manual articulation of the sex toy. Trust me, an easy handle makes for less tired arms and way more comfortable insertion angles are possible.
Looking for something a bit more substantial than an anal plug? Might we recommend the ultimate anal sex toy for self use the Slide dildo wand, with this toy you can instruct your submissive to do exactly as you command. If you are looking for a hardcore experience we suggest using The Walter, The Thruster's Premier thrusting anal dildo, for the experienced user.
All the stainless steel dildos from L’Acier are super easy to clean and will last a lifetime.
Using a dildo on your partner can be an amazing experience, but did you know there is another way to take that experience even further with something known as Femdom Pegging? Essentially using your Vac-U-Lock Adapter you can engage in the ultimate dominatrix experience with the power of a strap-on. You are able to take complete control and show your partner how they should be fucking!
