Ask Julietta: Best Orgasm Edition

Frequently Asked Orgasm Questions

Hello, dear readers. Recently, I’ve been flooded with so many questions around the topic of orgasms.  There’s so much to say about the big O, so keep your questions coming. Send a DM to the Thruster team. We want to hear from you. 

Here are some of my all time favorite orgasm questions to get your wheels turning. Stay cool out there!

I struggle to reach orgasm, even when masturbating.  Why am I having problems orgasming?

This is totally normal! When we struggle to reach orgasm even through masturbation, a couple things to ask are the following.  

If you answered yes to any of these, it's time to take a deep dive and see what you can do to improve it. Start with a reframe, you don’t have problems orgasming, you’re playing (and finding deeper and more meaningful pleasure along the way)!

If you're not fully relaxed, see how you can build a masturbation routine that would help you relax. If you're unsure about the technique, make a list of three through five different things you can try such as different techniques or sex toys.

Work fantasy into your exploration, spend a whole session jumping from scenario to scenario in your mind, notice which ones light you up and which ones bring on a lull. There’s so much pressure to be in the body that it can really take you out of the moment. This isn’t a problem orgasming so much as an invitation to get present with your own private realm of fantasy.

If the factor might be something like medication or stress, see if you can talk to a professional or what lifestyle changes you can make that could benefit your pleasure. 

How do you know the difference between types of orgasms?...a clit O, g-spot O, cervix O, etc.? 

The different types of orgasms are very much felt in their respective area. 

Clitoral O’s really dazzle your vulva, and you can feel this type of orgasm as those waves that hit your labia and even your vaginal opening. These are achieved through clitoral stimulation. Clitoral orgasms can be long or quick bursted, and really radiate the surface.

Nipple Sucking Orgasms, yes you heard correctly, come from direct and consistent nipple stimulation. With our brain being the biggest sexual organ, there are a fair amount of people who can reach orgasm strictly from nipple stimulation or nipple sucking. Try having your partner suck your nipples lightly, swirl their tongue in circles, and even give small bites. You can also apply a sex toy that vibrates to the nipples for added stimulation. Don’t be afraid to get messy with nipple sucking orgasms, you never know when you may… come!

G-spot O’s, better known as the internal portion of the clitoris, is one of the types of orgasm that can feel “deeper” and as if they travel through your pelvis and vagina. G-spot stimulation can feel different for everyone, and some people may be more of a fan than others. Many actually get the sensation they are going to “pee” with G-Spot O’s, when they actually just need to squirt. Yay! For many, a G- Spot orgasm can also radiate to your rectum which is super pleasurable. If you are having trouble reaching a g-spot orgasm during penetrative sex, try placing a pillow under your hips for a better angle. 

Cervix O’s, the deepest of all the types of orgasms, are very different experiences. Many people may not even know that they exist. In order to reach the cervix, you'll need deeper penetration. This can be fro a partner or a toy! An orgasm is achieved my pressure or rubbing of the nerve endings.  I haven’t had one myself, but I’ve been told that this type of orgasm is deep, long, and radiates the entire body. They say cervical stimulation is stimulation of the heart, so it only makes sense that your whole body enjoys it.

Is it normal for my orgasm to feel disappointing sometimes, I struggle with thinking of those ones as a ruined orgasm?   

I love this question because it is SO COMMON. Not all orgasms feel the same. Go easy on yourself, there is no such thing as a ruined orgasm. Some can feel extra sensational, while others can feel dull or numb. The feel and intensity of your orgasm can be manipulated by many factors. You may have a more powerful orgasm if you’re relaxed and have built up to it, while you may have a “duller” one if you’re stressed out and just trying to squeeze one in.   

Many who take antidepressants and other medications report having a hard time with orgasms. When they do reach climax, it may feel numb or not as exciting.   

Before you get disappointed with your O, look at all the factors. Are you relaxed? Are you in the right headspace? How are you reaching orgasm? Are you fully stimulated? Could there be something blocking the full potential of your orgasm? All things to consider.  Sometimes, real life can get in the way of our sex life, or sometimes an orgasm may just be disappointing. Not all Orgasms are created equal.    

I've never had a G-Spot orgasm. Is this normal? 

G-Spot orgasms were something of a mystery to me only up until a couple of years ago. The thing is, the female anatomy is very complex - with the G-Spot sitting a bit differently on everyone, it’s not all stimulated the same.